The Journal of an Idiot Pyro
by Nightmares and Melodys
Summary: Just Roy being Stupid in his Journal and telling you all about Life at the Smash Mansion. Rated for Safety! Dates are off.
1. Monday, January 17, 2011

A/N: First Fanfiction! :D YAY! I had this in my computer and thought, Why not upload it! So the dates are off by like... months. Lol. Hope you like it!

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Monday, January 17, 2011

I found this under Marth's bed, So I guess I'll be writing in from now on. I'm supposed to tell you a little bit about myself now, right? My name's Roy, I'm 16 and I'm from Pharae. My Hair's Red and Spikey and My eyes are blue. Normal Teenager, I guess. But How many Teenagers are generals or fought to the death and got Paid for it? Not a Lot I can tell you that. Yeah, I know what you thinking. Why use the past tense? Its cause During the Brawl tornament they had to get rid of some people, and Guess who one of them was! Me. The only reason I'm still here is cause Marth and Link pulled a Few Strings. I owe them big time... AND THEY'RE TAKING ADVANAGE OF THAT! I've had to freaking do EVERYTHING for them! Either way, I'm just glad I'm still here, even though I can't fight in the Tournament doesn't mean I can't train and hang out with the others.

I mean who doesn't want to leave a giant mansion, filled with Gourment food, Plasma TVs, Every game and Game system known to man(and Dinosaurs), and the greatest fights you'll ever see in your life? Just Ignore the fact that EVERYONE'S INSANE and this place is pretty awesome.

You heard me Right. EVERYONE IS COMPLETELY INSANE HERE. I'm not kidding. Marth's a neat-freak that gets totallly freaked out when you mess up his HAIR. He's so girly! Link's a ELF, which is weird cause he's one of the best fighters here. (GO GO FIGHTER ELF!) That Pit Kid is a Angel. For you Yaoi fangirls that I'm totally scared of, I DON'T LIKE PIT. He really is a Angel though! With Wings and Everything! HE CAN EFFING FLY! Not that I'm saying he's a bad kid, He's cool. (The best guy to pull pranks with around here xD) Where was I? Oh, yeah. The others. Ike is a Chicken freak, I'M SERIOUS! He carrys a Chicken Wing with him EVERYWHERE! He even was eating one during a Match against Link once! But He's seriously Strong, That sword of his weighs a ton! And Me, You ask? I'm a Half-dragon Pyromanic.

YES. A HALF-DRAGON. GET OVER IT. Pyromania isn't a bad thing, It just means I love Setting stuff on Fire. I've always loved Fire, I don't see what everyone gets so mad about when I set the couch on fire.

in Pink Ink

YOU SET IT ON FIRE ALMOST EVERY WEEK!

In Red Ink

WHATS WRONG WITH THAT? Anyway, Its almost time for Dinner. So I gotta put this away, before Marth sees it and starts laughing at me. We're having Fried Shrimp! (My Favorite!) I'll try to write tommorrow. FOOD TIME!

-Roy


	2. Thrusday, January 20, 2011

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Its been how long since I found this? A Week? I'm gonna need this thing since SOMEONE! keeps playing Love Song on MAX with his effing Ipod! AND THAT THING IS EFFING LOUD. So There's Piano music going through my head ALL. DAY. I hate him. I HATE SAMUS EVEN MORE! She was online and she looked up this retarded broadway song called, "if you were gay" AND IT WAS ME AND MARTH! I AM NOT GAY! Sheesh, Maybe Princey here is but- OW! HE HIT ME!

Calm Down, Roy, Before you set the journal on Fire.

... He's playing it again.

And Again.

And again...

GODS! WHAT HAPPENED DID HE BREAK UP WITH SOMEONE?

WHEN DID HE GET A GIRLFRIEND?OR IS IT A GUY!

IS HE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE HE CAN'T HAVE?

HE EFFING NEEDS TO TELL ME SO I CAN MAKE IT STOP AND HE CAN STOP THE STUPID LOVE SONGS!

Gods, That Felt good. I should do this more often.

What was I talking about?

Oh Yeah Samus.

IT WAS ME AND MARTH! Yeah, I was pissed off! Freaking going on about if I was Gay IN SPANISH. What was so funny about it was I told Marth, and His next match was against her! He kicked her ass! SERIOUSLY HARD! I know what your thinking, Samus is too smart/strong to be defeated by prince-not-so-charming. The thing is Samus's Visor broke (thanks to Pit. I LOVE THAT GUY! NO HOMO!) So she had to go Zero-suit and She's a MAJOR fangirl. Hahahahaha, and I made- Hahahaha... And I- HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! I made Marth go shirtless! There I said it! Hahahahahaha! He's so retarded! But he has a six-pack and Samus when INSANE fangirl! So she got PWNED! He was blushing like mad the whole time, and the fangirl in the stands when crazy! Even crazier when I ran out into the field and hugged him, yelling "TAKE THAT YOU INSANE FANGIRL!" Then we had to run away from some even crazier fangirls. IT WAS INSANE! We had to hide in Hot Topic. We got some shirts! I got a werid looking Thorn heart thing to attach to a Chain, a Daft Punk shirt, and some earings. Yeah, I wear earings. GET OVER IT!

Marth. Is. Playing. It. AGAIN.

THATS IT!

I'm gonna whoop some sense into that Kid. Cya next time.

-Roy

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A/N: I OWN NOTHING! Reviewwww For a Cookie :D


	3. Saturday, January 22, 2011

Okay, I'm such a lazy ass. -.- This is actually from a RP journal with my friends even though Roy and Marth don't show up that often. I guess, I felt bad for them so I made this. :3 Yeahh. My Ocs are Elena and Sky. My friend, Ed's Kirax. :3 Kira freaked out and yelled at Sky so Sky got pissed off then stormed into their room and locked him out. Elena is a old friend of Sky's and they love playing Black Ops together. Sky also has the biggest room in the entire manor, so Roy likes to sneak into there. Sorry if you get sorta confused!

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Saturday, January 22, 2011

ACKKKK! FANGIRLS, SUGAR, BLACK OPS! IT WAS ALL SO HORRIBLE! Except for the Black Ops part. IT WAS HORRIBLE!

Okay So I went to Marth to ask him WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH HIM after I get back from messing with Kirax's Memories. And He's all like, "I just broke up with my girlfriend." then he played Love Song AGAIN and I start freaking out. HE HAD A GIRLFRIEND AND DIDN'T TELL ME! I was freaking out and yelling, " YOU HAD A GIRLFRIEND! WHO IS SHE! WHATS HER NAME! WHAT DOES SHE LOOK LIKE! IS SHE HOT?" I bet the whole freaking mansion heard me, I know Sky could. She was pissed off about Kirax (I'm still pissed off too.) So she was playing Black Ops with that Elena Girl. Anyway, He's all like, "I don't wanna talk about it." And YOU NEVER say that to me. Marth should know by NOW that if you tell me 'I dont wanna talk about' I WANNA KNOW EVEN MORE! So I grab him by the shoulders and Bang my head against his head (THAT TIARA HURTS...) and yell.

"YOU HAD A GIRLFRIEND AND DIDN'T TELL ME! HOW LONG WAS THIS! ANSWER ME! IS SHE HOT!"

For you EVIL people reading this, I HAD TO ASK IF SHE WAS HOT. I mean, DUH! Hot SINGLE New Girl just waiting for the taking!

Then He says, "I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. YES SHES HOT. She's fricken Sexy." I laughed at that part then I dragged him to Sky's Room (THANK GOD SHE WAS GONE AND SO WAS KIRAX. She woulda killed us.) So I'm yelling at him about this girl, and he's moping so I throw a PS3 controller at his face. SOME RANDOM FANGIRLS OUT OF NOWHERE RUNS UP TO HIM AND YELL "Don't Hurt Princess!"

I blinked.

He blinked.

I DIED LAUGHING.

Then this psycho fangirl runs up and tries to punch me in the gut so I sidestep INTO ANOTHER ONE. She starts hugging me and yells, "I GOT THE PYRO!" then 4 others come out of nowhere grab me and start PULLING ME APART, CUTTING MY HAIR, RIPPING MY CLOTHES. They're doing the same thing to Marth! I set the girls foot on fire, God that felt good. They let go so I go to save Marth, He's my best friend. I can't just LEAVE him at the mercy of those monsters! I fall over trying to save him and fall on top of him and they go COMPLETELY INSANE! Cameras, Camcorers, Cell phones, ONE OF THEM WAS VIDEO CHATTING ON HER LAPTOP! I grab his arm and dash for the door, They block it, We run for the window, They block it, The bathroom, THEY FOLLOWED US INSIDE! Thats just gross! By the time Marth and I manage to get them out, we start talking Battle plan.

With fangirls you have to think. They know your every ability, They're civilans so you can't hurt them, and they know EVERY THING!

"We could try the window."  
"Blocked."  
"The Kitchen? It has knives."  
"Civilans."  
"Crap forgot about that."  
"Wanna challange them?"  
"To what?"  
"Black Ops."  
"ARE YOU SERIOUS?"

So he opens the door and walks straight into what most people here call HELL! I'm sitting there, thinking, "I'm not gonna help him... I'm not gonna help him..."

The fangirls start screaming, I run outside.

FUCK, MARTH'S TAKING OFF HIS SHIRT!

He grabs me and starts pulling off MY shirt and he's like, "Come on, Take it off if you wanna live!" I take if off and they're screaming like the fangirls they are! Marthy here smiles and goes, "Whose first?"

WHAT THE HELL? HE'S FREAKING OFFERING US TO THE FANGIRLS!

We get hit in the face with the PS3 controllers and I see Sky in the window, LAUGHING HER ASS OFF. Note to self, KILL SKY LATER. We end up kicking their asses at Black ops cause Marth found out he's actually REALLY GOOD AT IT and cause the whole time the girls were tryna GLOMP us and TAKE OFF OUR PANTS. Sheesh! I was soo into the game I actually let a fangirl push me over onto Marth's lap and I didn't feel like getting up so I just laid there. You know, Chilling playing Black ops with mah bud, Marth, like no one else was there. Turns out they were YAOI fangirls (Oh god...) So we beat them even harder. I'M SERIOUS! THEY WERE BARELY PLAYING! They were too busy taking pictures and crap. Then Marth gets the bright idea to give me Sugar, to make me insane and hyper. WHICH IS AWESOME, But i usually end up burning the mansion down. He gets up and runs to Kitchen and comes back with a Cookie Jar and he all like, "Rooooooy! Look what I gottt!" And he takes out a cookie and starts teasing me with it! The fangirls are all, "AWWWWWWWHHHH" and they're recording it so I take the whole jar and eat it all! (CHOCOLATE CHIPS!)

About a Hour later, I wake up on Marth IN HIS BED and I'm completely NAKED. Turns out I went on a Rampage and set most of the mansion on fire but Sky, Kirax and Red were there and put it out as I went along. But When I passed out, some of the fangirls got me and I DONT WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.

The Moral of the Story,

NEVER GO INTO SKY'S ROOM IF SHES NOT THERE.

Its Lunch time :3 We're having Sushi today! I'll write again soon!

-Roy.


End file.
